A comprehensive review of Halloween candy

Sam Spray and Riley Coesens

Halloween is what some would call the most controversial time of year. Why? Because of one dividing factor: candy. Though some of these treats are held in higher esteem in the public eye than others, they all deserve a fair shot to be considered a fan-favorite of the season; that is why we have decided to undertake the monumental task of writing comprehensive reviews on numerous Halloween-themed candies.

We feel it necessary to begin with the most disputed one: candy corn. This treat is surprisingly popular, and has been for generations of people. Yet, 66.7 percent of the Milford students we surveyed do not consider it to be the delicacy that we do. Overall, we rated candy corn as a solid 8/10, because it is straight sugar in its most pure form and is a deliciously sweet treat.

One lesser known candy is pumpkin pie Kit Kats, which provide an individual with a unique punch of cinnamon mixed with white chocolate and the wafer texture we all know and love. Although these candies can be mistaken as unjustifiably overpowering, they offer a scent that is undeniably “autumn”. They remind one of the aromas of entering a Yankee Candle store, which some might find aggressive, but others view as a positive experience. We give this 5.79/10 because of our opinions on its similarity to fall-scented candles and the flavor it leaves behind.

Next on the list is the most atrocious disgrace of a candy that we have ever experienced: pumpkin-shaped York peppermint patties. These sweets have a texture akin to that of toothpaste, and the taste of non-alcoholic mouthwash where the chocolate flavor is lost. They dissolve instantly upon impact with your tongue into a slimey, foaming consistency, comparable to licking a slug on the pavement after it rains. We scored this a 0/10, because it does not deserve to be sold to anyone, or exist in a reality where we also live.

On a more positive note, white chocolate Reese’s Ghosts are ranked higher, as they are like Casper in comparison to other more gruesome Halloween characters. This sweet is similar to the flavor of Reese’s Puffs cereal, adding a marshmallowy texture that pleases one’s taste buds. The white chocolate is not tempered, which allows it to melt in one’s mouth in a way that satisfies one’s cravings. Although the peanut butter ghosts pale in comparison to regular Reese’s pumpkins that everyone knows and loves, they still rank as one of the best Halloween candies in our opinion, and therefore received a rating of 8.6/10.

Following the Reese’s, we tasted Hershey’s Tombstone mini bars. These candies are a Halloween take on an American classic, and although they do not change the formulation of the treat itself in any way, they help the consumer immerse him/herself into the spirit of the season.

We had differing opinions on the traditional milk chocolate and cookies and cream bars due to our personal preferences that persist annually. Sam does not enjoy the consistency of Hershey’s milk chocolate, but is obsessed with the cookies and cream Hershey’s bars. On the contrary, Riley liked both the milk chocolate and cookies and cream flavored treats, as both offer different flavors that can satisfy a variety of palettes. Together we gave the tombstones 7.5 /10 as a combined score including both types of chocolate.

To conclude our candy feast, we sampled Zombie Skittles. Were they tasty? At times–each Skittle offered a different flavor of the rainbow. Were they enjoyable, and fun to experience? Yes. The normal Skittles that were included in each miniature package were delicious and were not like those in a typical red package.

However, the “rotten zombie” flavor, hidden and disguised as a normal one of the other five options, makes the consumer contemplate if having taste buds is really worth it.

To say that they are bad is the understatement of the century; they taste like a “burnt lawnmower”, according to Sam. Riley described it as overcooked, charred meat, with a hint of smokiness that is undesirable to anyone who enjoys the taste of normal food. Similarly, MHS teacher Daniel Reschke commented, “I didn’t care for them because I don’t like surprises.”

These uniquely-horrifying Skittles are quite a brutal surprise, but they allow for unfiltered reactions and entertainment. We rated these -10/10 for ironic enjoyment and the opportunity it provides to spook your friends, as they are typically unsuspecting of what is to come.

No matter what Halloween candies you enjoy, we encourage readers to explore their options–maybe you’ll find something you love or hate! Stay safe and have a fun Halloween full of delicious, disgusting, and surprising candy.